Bass Player Joke

[SonicGator]

Saw this on another forum and thought I'd share it:

A father signed his 14-year-old son up for bass lessons. After the first week's lesson, the father asked his son, "What did you learn in your lesson today?" The son replied, "I learned this: G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G."

After the second week's lesson, the father asked his son, "What did you learn in your lesson today?" The son replied, "I learned this: D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D."

After the third week's lesson, the father asked his son, "What did you learn in your lesson today?" The son replied, 'What lesson? I had a gig."

[Pietro]

How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. The Keyboard Player does it with his left hand.

[ckofahl]

Ok, here's some for the guitar players, ....How do you get the guitar player off your portch, .....pay him for the pizza.

What's the difference between a large pizza and a guitar player....the large pizza can feed a family of 4.

[LonestarGtr]

and my fave:

How do you get a guitar player to play quieter?

Put sheet music in front of him

[strat56]

How can you tell when a singer is at your front door?
He can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in.

What do you call a musician with a credit card?
Married.

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?
Homeless.

[dave]

where would you find a drummer with no legs?

where you left him!

[Kid Metric]

What do you do when a banjo player is drowning?
Throw the banjo in with him.

[Kid Metric]

A blues cat is on his way to a gig, and runs out of gas.
He goes up to a farm house, and asks the farmer for some gas.
As they walk to the fuel tank, a pig with a wooden leg is following them up the driveway.
The muso asks, "what's with the pig?
The farmer says, "that's a special pig, he pulled me out of a burning barn, and saved my life!"
"Well, what's with the leg?"
"Well, a special pig like that you can't eat all at once!"

[Pietro]

How do you tell a drummer is at your door?
He speeds up when he knocks.

What time of day is it when the drummer says, let's do some of my songs?
Time to find a new drummer.

How do you know the stage is level?
There's drool coming out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them. One to change it and the others to say how much better Jimmie Page could've done it.

[LonestarGtr]

What's the difference between a frog carrying a tuba and a banjo player walking down the street?

The frog's probably going to a gig.

[Pietro]

The least often heard question in the English Language...
"is that the banjo player's porsche?"

Difference between a violin and a viola and a cello.
violin burns, viola burns longer, cello burns longest...

[mbrown3]

How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them. One to change it and the others to say how much better Jimmie Page could've done it.

Page? Really? Hard to find the humor in a joke that mentions such a sad guitar player!

:)